I consider myself to be relatively knowledgeable about a lot of things.  In particular, among a lot of my peers I’m sometimes considered the “women’s issues” expert, and people come to me specifically for my opinion “as a feminist.”  But I don’t know everything.  I have friends I can turn to for questions about ethnic diversity, multicultrualism, GLBQ understanding, and so on.  However, I’ve only begun learning about each of these.  And that pesky little “T” is often left out of these discussions (for instance, the Allies training at my university held a separate session on trans issues rather than covering them in the initial training).  So I am doing my best to become educated about the experiences of trans individuals.  And I will admit that that meant that the first thing I did was wikipedia the word “cis” that I kept seeing around.

Cisgender is an adjective used in the context of gender issues and counselling to refer to a class of gender identities formed by a match between an individual’s gender identity and the behavior or role considered appropriate for one’s sex.^[1] Cisgender is a neologism that means “someone who is comfortable in the gender they were assigned at birth”, according to Calpernia Addams.^[2] “Cisgender” is used to contrast “transgender” on the gender spectrum.

This is how we learn.  It can be embarrassing, nerve-wracking, and above all humbling to admit when we don’t know and ask for more information.  It can feel almost shameful to stumble around looking for answers to questions we feel like we should just understand already.  But I encourage each of us to keep searching, keep learning, and keep asking (sensitively) so that we can become better friends, allies, and general human beings.  Here are some other great articles on trans issues that I’ve come across this week.

Who am I? [feministing]

I am tired-tired of my transgender identity being pushed aside by my LGBT people, by my brothers and sisters- the organizations, groups, and individuals pushing us-the T aside- in order to push their agenda further. Telling me, telling us that our time will come, that we will have a way, an option, a fight, an ally. I am the one who is tired and refuses to wait for that time, but one of many who makes their own time!I am one of many who will take our place in the struggle for equality. Not jogging behind, or stepped on, but standing next too our sisters and brothers fighting for equal rights- in addition to trans rights- not in lieu of them. I am the pissed off transgender womyn-with a y- who will forcefully take my place in the front line, not as a token, but as a warrior for peaceful means for equality.

You don’t get to out me [feministe]

When I out myself, or am outed, I never know what the reaction will be. Before hormones, and early transition, my transness was noticed quite frequently. Now, I have to be outed—by my documents most often, or by my friends, family and acquaintances. Which is where y’all come in. So here’s the deal: if you out us, you can do more damage than you can possibly imagine.

The Term Same Sex Marriage = Cissexist [amplify]

We have done something right by framing the issue as “marriage equality” or “civil marriage”. But the term “same sex marriage” simply creates a binary of cisgender male marries cisgender female, cisgender male marries cisgender male, or cisgender female marries cigender female.

“I am not defending women, I am defending society. I as a man suffer if my wife has been subject to violence and is treated as a second-class citizen. [Then] we have an unstable relationship and our children suffer.”

- Bassam al-Kadi

Bassam al-Kadi is the head of the leading women’s right organization in Syria, the Syrian Women’s Observatory.  From The Christian Science Monitor via Jezebel.

“I think it’s important for somebody from a big, commercial movie series like ‘Harry Potter’ and particularly because I am not gay or bisexual or transgendered. … The fact that I am straight makes not a difference, but it shows that straight people are incredibly interested and care a lot about this as well.”

- Daniel Radcliffe

Radcliff on why it was important to him to film a PSA for The Trevor Project.  From NY Daily News via Jezebel.

I’ll admit that I typically don’t give crime shows a fair chance.  Something about horrific crimes as entertainment rubs me the wrong way, and when sex gets rolled into the mix it seems like a recipe for disaster.  But I gave Law & Order: Special Victims Unit it’s chance, and let me tell you – I was pleasantly surprised (thanks Netflix instant queue!).

I still believe strongly that sex and violence are a dangerous cocktail, but SVU handles the topics with class.  The violence, although sexual, is never sexy, and the bad guys are almost always clearly bad (exceptions include child perps and false accusers).  Stranger rape, date rape, marital rape are all treated with equal seriousness (a level of respect we often can’t even expect from our own local news), and more controversial topics such as sexual orientation, sex work, and patient-doctor confidentiality and spousal privilege are handled with care.

Furthermore, the female characters on the show are complex, intelligent, and self-sufficient.  On top of this, their counterparts are possibly the most decent men I’ve seen on television in a long time.  Detectives look out for each other regardless of gender, and there is a sense of camaraderie and caring that has nothing to do with genitalia.  For instance, knowing Detective Benson’s sensitive history with her father (all she knows about him is that he’s the man who raped her mother), Detective Stabler calls out a coworker who made an inappropriate joke about the subject.  He does this discretely and out of a desire to protect his partner, not a poor sensitive woman, and Det. Benson watches Stabler’s back with an equal amount of respect and concern when his buttons are pushed.

Although Det. Benson is still in the minority as a woman detective on the unit, she is quickly replacing Special Agent Dana Scully as my favorite woman in uniform.  She is always the defender of justice, warmly and kindly comforting the victims of the atrocities featured on the show while giving the Ice Queen a run for her money when she gets alone in the room with a perp.  The various ADAs across seasons (nearly always portrayed by women) are equally cool and collected and fantastic at their jobs.

One of the most unique themes that I’ve noticed in watching, however, is the clear and direct condemnation of misogyny.  Many of the perps on the show target women (prostitutes, girlfriends, wives, strangers) because they are women.  One of the ADAs sets out to be the first lawyer to successfully convict a rapist of a hate crime.  The hatred and loathing these criminals (and occasionally cops) have for women illustrate the most vile misogyny that can be imagined – and they way that it is portrayed is as disgusting and loathsome as it really is.

Although there isn’t a great deal of ethnic diversity on the team and no significant address of ablism, the competent women on the show are a breath of fresh air, as are their respectful and admirable coworkers – men as allies in “women’s issues” fights are too sparse on television.  The women are still held to a higher standard as far as the limited variety in body image portrayed and the requirement that they are still able to demonstrate a sensitive and nurturant side that is more acceptably absent in male characters, but I’m willing to argue that Law & Order SVU is a pretty feminist-friendly show.  And with 11 seasons under its belt, I’m impressed that it has been given the chance to put these images and messages out there for so long.

Shoutouts to the post at Bitch blog that addressed this a little while ago.  Follow their (and my) advice and give it chance if you haven’t yet!